The Art of Relationships

The film (500) Days of Summer, which is directed by Marc Webb, is the story of boy meets girl. The story is twisted from Hollywood convention, though, when the narrator tells the audience at the beginning that the boy and girl will not live happily ever after. Instead of being a grand love story, this movie is a story about love for a period of time in the lives of our characters.

Tom is our leading man who has grand aspirations when it comes to the concept of love and being in love. Summer is our leading lady who does not believe in love or being in love. Despite this inherent obstacle, these two characters begin a relationship after a series of encounters at work. The movie chronicles their relationship in a nonlinear fashion showing points of the beginning and the end of the relationship to give the audience a peak at what made this couple work at first and subsequently end.

This movie is full of issues relating to relational dialects and relationship issues. The audience can gain equipment for living from this film by exploring how this relationship is portrayed. Summer makes it clear from her first interaction with Tom outside of work that she is the type of person who doesn’t believe in true love. Tom cannot believe that Summer is serious and chooses to believe that she will change her mind in the long run. Tom and Summer enter into a relationship where Tom is certain that things will lead to the type of fantasy love that he has dreamed about his whole life. This leads to issues including integration and separation. Tom’s ideas threaten Summer’s sense of independence from the relationship. Summer just wants the type of relationship where she can have fun with Tom and go out and do things with him without the notion that it will lead to anything too serious. The relationship is doomed to fail because Tom and Summer have conflicting ideas concerning relationships. Tom thinks that Summer will eventually choose to give up some of her independence and settle down with him like he has always dreamed his life would go. Since Summer is set in her convictions, Tom loses “me-we tug of war” which hurts the relationship in the long run. Audiences can look at this film and take away many things about the construct of relationships. It is clearly show that the two people that are entering into a relationship must not be on completely opposite pages in regard to what they want out of the relationship. Also, it would be a grave mistake to think that a person can change another person’s mind about an important life decision. People cannot begin relationships under the assumption that they are going to get more out of the person than what they agree upon at the beginning.

Another issued addressed in the film is the relational dialect issue of stability and change. It is believed that stability is strived for in a relationship. At the same time, variety is needed in the relationship to keep things from getting bland and too predictable. In the case of the movie, Summer is mostly in the relationship for the crazy, spontaneous things she can do with Tom. She has no aspirations to start living in any kind of relationship that gets to stable and long term. Tom, on the other hand, enjoys the unpredictable things that he and Summer do when they are out, but mostly wants to have that dream love that he had ingrained in him ever since he was young. The spontaneous parts of Tom and Summer’s relationship are the part of the relationship that worked the best. Summer was getting what she wanted out of it and Tom was having fun around a girl he thought he would end up with for the rest of his life. As the film plays out, it is shown that a relationship cannot survive on crazy adventures alone. Sometime in relationship there is going to come a point where the couple must decide to part ways or settle down together. At least, that is the belief in the modern world. Audiences can see from this movie that spontaneity and stability have to exist hand in hand for a serious relationship to work out in the long run. Relationships need to have moments of reckless abandon to keep things exciting and interesting. You do not want to get bored with this person you are deciding to spend your time with for the time being. Letting loose can be one of the key points in the reason for the longevity of relationships. Also a thing that has to be considered to go along with this is stability. It is all well and good to have fun adventures, but stability has to be attained if a relationship is going to get serious. If all you want to do is have a little fun, you can most certainly just rely on having crazy nights with your partner. There must be a discussion amongst partners to make sure that is what both people want out the relationship. You do not want to end up like Tom trying to change Summer to believe in what he believes. Stability can gives two people in a relationship a sense of comfort that can lead to a more satisfying and rewarding relationship. All of this just depends on what is desired from the relationship.

(500) Days of Summer shows many interesting issues regarding relationships and how people react when they are in relationships. The subject of relational dialects can be discussed at great lengths when approaching this movie. Tom and Summer have fun in their relationship, but in the end they are not what they needed for one another at the time in their lives when they were together. Relationships must be examined carefully and not rushed into if you are planning on having something serious.